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The U.S. Oh No She Didn't Golf Tournament!

Posted by on 6/18/2013


My father is a huge golf fan. His only wish for Father's Day was to play 18 holes with his buddies, then come home, settle comfortably into his favorite chair, and watch the final round of the US Open golf tournament, which he had recorded earlier in the day. And with so many players going into the final day with a chance to win, he was really looking forward to watching the drama unfold. He had a bowl of popcorn on one side, a cooler of ice cold beer on the other, and the fastest remote control money can buy, so he could zip through the commercials and get right back to the action. It was going to be the perfect Father's Day.

Just as the leaders were teeing off on the first hole, in walks my Grandma. The first thing she says is "are you watching the golf match?" And before anyone could stop her she followed with "Oh it was so exciting Tiger played poorly and Phil was great but not great enough and did you see those Octopus pants Horschel was wearing and I really like that Matt Kucher fellow and Justin Rose came out of nowhere to win and it was amazing don't you think and oh you knew that already right?"

My father quietly turned the television off and spent the next seven hours staring blankly into space. At one point I thought he was going to cry.

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